Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I'm your biggest fan...

For most of my life, I've had difficulty understanding the thought process behind being a fan of someone. To be fair, for most of my life I've also lived in a box with very little exposure to the outside world. But why be interested in the day-to-day goings on of certain people? Why does Selena Gomez keep ending up in the Top 10 news stories of the Free Press? Why do we watch lengthy videos of Justin Bieber doing his hair?

Then I realized that I'm not actually above fandom. I just have very weird tastes in..."celebrities".
For instance, today, while rushing through the mall trying to find 3 people willing to tell me what they would do if the world was ending (would you believe that took me 45 minutes?), I noticed a very tall, strangely dressed young man with random bits of blue in his hair skipping through the foodcourt singing along to the music in his headphones (one would assume).

He smiled and waved at me and I smiled and waved at him, and my first thought was, I must follow this person and see what he does next. I didn't really want to befriend him, didn't want to get to know him on a real live personal level, but suddenly I was thinking "if there were a poster of weird singing blue-hair man, I would put that on my wall....like, if it was free, I mean". Thus, a star is born. I guess that's all a celebrity is, is someone whose life is theoretically more interesting than your own.

Other candidates for Amy's List of Unlikely Celebrities include:

-The anonymous person who put up those Because Killing Your Roommate's Cat With Cookware Is Never a Good Idea fliers all over the downtown when I was in highschool. I don't want to know this person, but I want to know OF them. I'll memorize all their strange anonymous lovenotes and when I see Anonymous, I'll yell them out, line by line, word for word, like my favourite song lyrics.

-The brindled cat who hangs out on my roof. Do I want this cat as my friend? Of course not. Do I excitedly rush to my window and stare him down every time I hear him on the roof? Of course. I'm pretty sure I'd treat Eminem or Lady Gaga the same way.

-The hilarious person who always puts a copy of The Manitoban on top of the stack of Uniters in the Second Cup on River and Osbourne. I want to know what else this person does with their free time. Have they adopted a husky puppy from D'Arcy's ARC? Is that puppy eating rocks? What does this person do to their hair every morning?

-The woman at the bus stop who spent most of our wait for the bus inventing a device suitable for punishing drivers who drive through puddles and splash pedestrians. She wasn't easy to carry on a conversation with, but I'd really like to see what she came up with next. And also, you know, who she's dating and whether her eyebrows are real.

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