And then My Cousin became a Knife-Weilding Gangster

It would appear my Updated Every Tuesday and Thursday mandate has become a Secretly Only Update On Wednesdays sneak attack. Hey, regular programming lasted for what, three weeks? I call that a win.
 
For my latest run-in with my other self, someone accused me of being a marking assistant at a school in another city and tried to enlist my help to create The Student Assistant Crime-Fighting Heroes Guild or something like that, and it took me several days and some rather convoluted conversations to piece this all together and once again point them in the direction of the Other Me.

This was rather exciting, since the Other Me has upgraded from being Hot Girl of the Month and having promo cards of her in her stripper outfit from her recent movie debut floating around the web, to posting photos of her holding sobbing men at knife point outside of fast food restaurants. I felt this would really fit in with the Student Assistant Heroes Guild, and I was happy to send the confused youth her way.

Every time I have a run-in with the Other Me it reminds me that I am constantly being one-upped by a distant younger cousin who is trading on my name. Why does she get to be so bad-ass? I post a photo of me on the motorcycle I don't even know how to ride, she posts a photo of herself mugging someone (with a knife she clearly knows how to use). I start a blog, she becomes a bikini model. I go to a pop culture conference, she stars in a feature-length pseudo-80's horror flick. I let my cat move into my room, and the Other Me moves to Toronto to become a famous actress. My life is so uneventful I am reduced to complaining about a distant cousin, she joins the Student Assistant Heroes Guild and begins saving the world one literature paper at a time.

I feel there's nothing for it but to join forces and become a screenwriting/acting duo, thusly tricking the public into thinking that Amy writes the script to every movie she stars in, and stars in every movie she writes the script for. We'll keep it quiet for years, then come out with the Amy vs Amy tell-all book. So look forward to that, my closest fans. Oh yes, it will be magical.